Dad

Oh how I wish my dad was here. There has been atleast 5 times over the course of this weekend that I have wanted to just get in my car and drive over there. He always knew the exact thing to say to me, sometimes without even having to say a word. I know I talk about my dad a lot. And trust, me. I miss my mom too. But the conversations I remember most about real life have been with Dad. He was there when I found the man I wanted to marry and I went to him for his approval. He walked me down the isle holding my hand soo tightly that my knuckles were white. He was the first person I called when I found out I was pregnant after being told my whole life I would never have children. He was the first person I called the worst night of my life when we pulled up to find our home and everything in it burned to the ground and was the only one able to make me feel at ease. He was my bestest friend and sometimes when things are going on with me and I get that feeling of wanting to run.. he was always the one that kept me grounded. I needed him this weekend.. and I have missed him so much that at times I find it hard for me to breathe. After his death I felt his strength. I have never felt that before and it was almost like I knew what he would do. What he would say. I feel that strength slipping away and I need it back.
I dont know why this is bothering me so. I guess it is just one of them days.