Dad

Oh how I wish my dad was here. There has been atleast 5 times over the course of this weekend that I have wanted to just get in my car and drive over there. He always knew the exact thing to say to me, sometimes without even having to say a word. I know I talk about my dad a lot. And trust, me. I miss my mom too. But the conversations I remember most about real life have been with Dad. He was there when I found the man I wanted to marry and I went to him for his approval. He walked me down the isle holding my hand soo tightly that my knuckles were white. He was the first person I called when I found out I was pregnant after being told my whole life I would never have children. He was the first person I called the worst night of my life when we pulled up to find our home and everything in it burned to the ground and was the only one able to make me feel at ease. He was my bestest friend and sometimes when things are going on with me and I get that feeling of wanting to run.. he was always the one that kept me grounded. I needed him this weekend.. and I have missed him so much that at times I find it hard for me to breathe. After his death I felt his strength. I have never felt that before and it was almost like I knew what he would do. What he would say. I feel that strength slipping away and I need it back.
I dont know why this is bothering me so. I guess it is just one of them days.

Bubble Bath Moments

Wow. What a amazing night. It's still overwhelming to me how God continues to take me out of my comfort zone and "nudge" me to do things I never drempt I would do. Tonight was the book signing for Bubble Bath Moments. In my mind I backed out of going atleast 5 times. LOL. I dont know what it is about me that is unable to take credit for something I have done, or swallow a compliment. I trembled as I walked through the doors only to find myself surrounded by wonderful ladies who made me feel at ease and part of a family. As I stood there, unsure of WHO would want MY autograph, I had the opportunity to meet wonderful REAL women who were touched by the stories written in this book. At that moment I was reminded that THAT is what is was all about. Not me, not being nervous... but having the opportunity to be a part of something encouraging. Be able to watch God touch the lives of others through what we had written. Women who felt just like us and lived each and every word of our testimony. Yes, even what I had written bursting with my all of my insecurites. God always has a way of putting us where he feels we need to be, whether we like it or not. It was truly a blessing and I'm so glad to be a part of it.